i love and hate smoking

Almost everyday this past week, I've told myself that this will be my last pack of smokes. I'm gonna quit. I'm gonna do it. It's gonna happen. And almost everyday this past week, I've justified to myself that those statements will be just as true tomorrow as they would be today. Being so low on cash since Christmas, it seems really the most viable thing to do, quit. I've told myself that I'll take the money that I would spend on smokes and deposit it into the bank. I've told myself that I'll use that money to join a gym, save for vacation or just plain use to see my balance increase in increments of $8.

Then the time comes when I have none left. I note that it's not a great time being the middle of the day or the middle of the night or the morning, to quit. I go to work thinking that maybe I'll avoid break-time smokes and just work. But, I never do.

I love smoking at certain times and just don't want to live without the goodness of the first haul. I hate smoking because it's an incredible waste of money that I use to slowly drain myself of life. Why can I give up drinking alcohol and smoking pot, but this I find so difficult to? And as I contemplate lighting up as I type, I realize--clearly, this must be the heaviest drug.

The 2005 Super 7 Lists

Good God, is it 2006 already?! Yep, guess so considering I found myself surrounded by Best Of lists throughout the internet, the newspapers, endless entertainment shows and industry magazines. So after plenty of listening to what now seems old, I've widdled my favourites down to just seven (who needs 10 anyways?) for a bunch of music lists below. And, although some of the appearances on my lists may have officially been released before 2005, they sustained power into the past year well enough to been included. If you wanna be that technical, go write a statistics manual... So, without further ado, please enjoy seburnspot's 2005 Super 7 Lists!

Seven Singles
So many fabulous singles to choose from this year made this list INCREDIBLY difficult to weed down to just seven, but here they are in all they're deserved glory.
7. Soulwax - NY Excuse
6. Vitalic - My Friend Dario
5. Kelly Clarkson - Since You've Been Gone
4. Rachel Stevens - Negotiate With Love
3. Goldfrapp - Number One
2. Datarock - I Used to Dance With My Daddy
1. Madonna - Hung Up

Seven Remixes
Soulwax certainly didn't cut it in the album department, but phew--they certain kick ass in the remix chart!
7. Gwen Stefani - Hollaback Girl (ZAX Word Up Radio Edit)
6. Fischerspooner - Never Win (Mirwais Alternate Mix)
5. Depeche Mode - A Pain That I'm Used To (Jacques Lu Cont Remix)
4. Beck - Bad Cartridge (E-Pro) (Remix by Paza of the X-Dump)
3. The Knife - Hearbeats (Rex the Dog Mix)
2. LCD Soundsystem - Daft Punk is Playing at My House (Soulwax Shibuya Mix)
1. Felix da Housecat - Rocket Ride (Soulwax Rock It Mix)

Seven Albums
Ok, so here we are at the ultimate list: albums! There were several more that really deserved a mention, but oh well.
7. The White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
6. Goldfrapp - Supernature
5. Beck - Guero
4. Fiona Apple - Extraordinary Machine
3. Datarock - Datarock
2. Fischerspooner - Odyssey
1. Madonna - Confessions On a Dance Floor